What therapy looks like in theory

There is no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to therapy. Working primarily with adults, I approach therapy from a trauma-informed, compassion-focused, and goal-oriented and neuroaffirming perspective. Ideally, the goal is to help you build a rich and meaningful life. Therapy is teamwork, and it's our role as a team to figure out what impedes living life to the fullest. The main aim is to enable you to look within and cultivate a supportive relationship with yourself, helping you understand and work with your emotions rather than allowing them to overwhelm you. As a team, we will work to build a toolbox that helps you achieve your goals using a range of information and evidence-based treatment modalities. Here's a snapshot of what we might draw from:

  • Mindfulness techniques and Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR)

  • Neuroscience

  • Attachment Theory

  • Polyvagal Theory

  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

  • Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT)

  • Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

  • I also incorporate ideas from Internal Family Systems (IFS), Somatic Experiencing techniques and Compassionate Inquiry.

If the above means nothing to you, don’t worry, you’re not alone. Read on to see “translation” below.

What therapy looks like with me

My favorite part of the journey with a client is when we start making sense of behaviours, especially those that some may refer to as self-sabotage. While the behaviors we engage in may not always immediately make sense to us, with a bit of investigation, they usually reveal a strong protective intention. This newfound awareness allows us to transform our relationship with these behaviours, enabling us to make more informed choices. Gradually, as we recognize deeply ingrained patterns, we may come to realise that they are merely strategies designed to ensure our safety but may no longer be serving our best interests. That’s the space where you start building the life you want.

It takes observation skills, practice, and patience. The work lies in developing mindfulness skills, exploring values, and fostering compassionate and realistic self-reflection. It also requires learning how your body and emotions communicate with you. Since they don’t communicate in words, we need to develop the skills to listen and translate the messages our body sends us. This can help us uncover what’s really "you" and detangle it from a conditioned or habitual response. This can be a challenging journey, but imagine the empowerment you may find in making choices that serve you.

In our sessions, the goals we pursue are always tailored to your individual needs, yet certain recurring themes tend to emerge, with the most prominent being our relationship with emotions. Unless prompted, most of us neglect to question or observe our behaviour and thoughts consciously. Often, we perceive our emotions to be little dictators within our body, leaving us with no choice and subjecting us to their whims. This is where many of us get stuck. However, with a bit of curiosity, emotions typically reveal themselves as misunderstood messengers that have lost their way in translation.

Emotions get a bad reputation, especially the uncomfortable ones, but they’re not the enemy.

Therapy can be a way of putting all the puzzle pieces together to help you makes sense of your world and firmly claim your place in it.

In the words of the brilliant Gabor Maté:

“We can be responsible for the mind we create with which we create our world moving forward. ”
— Gabor Maté, The Myth of Normal - Trauma, Illness and Healing in a Toxic Culture.